When we bought our house nearly seven years ago, we had big plans to live and grow in this home for many years to come.
And let me tell you, we have grown.
Move-in day was just two days before Christmas, 2006. We were the proud parents of a 6 and a three-year-old boy and our brand new four-month-old daughter. Over these past years, we have added three more sweet babies. Those 6 and three-year-old boys are now 10, and 13 and that four-month-old daughter turns seven next month. The other baby blessings are 4, 2, and infant.
Time marches on.
As time has been busy with all this marching, our 1915 farmhouse on two green acres has taken good care of us. We originally had planned to take good care of her–I naturally think of my house as a girl. 🙂
When we moved in, we had two full-time incomes, and part of our big plan was to remodel slowly, repaint, add shutters, and doll the place up. Within a year of moving in, I felt the Lord challenge me to stay home full-time. My three 12-hour night shifts over the weekends as a Charge Nurse were taking their toll on the family. And waking up while driving and headed for a row of mailboxes helped confirm the direction as well.
Coming home full-time, however, meant that we’d have to lay down our dreamy plans of fixing up our new-to-us home.
Don’t get me wrong. I love where the Lord has planted us. In these rooms, our children laugh and grow. From the kitchen window, we’ve watched the red cardinals eat bird seed that we’ve left for them in the snow. In these rooms, I’ve cried out to the Lord that we would live our lives for His glory.
But all reminiscing aside, this house is falling apart.
I don’t even see it most days. It’s now natural for a doorknob to fall off here, while a tile cracks there. Over the last four years, the paint has peeled off the exterior in sheets. The rooms feel like they’re closing in, so we spend a lot of time outside. And to add another layer to my character training through living in this house, the gutters fell off last year.
Some days I’ve wondered if it’s the house that’s falling apart, or if it’s just me who is in disrepair.
4 Lessons in Contentment From My Run-Down Old Farm House
*What if today, this day, is as good as it ever gets?
Am I not already blessed? Self-absorbed me, should I complain? I have a husband who is forever patient and gentle and a joyful brood of children who I’m privileged to mother. I have a Mighty God who has never, ever forsaken me.
We have two refrigerators full of food, so many clothes that we can never seem to get them all put-away, and just last month I loaded up the bed of my husband’s truck full to overflowing with items that we needed to purge.
Really Jamerrill, your heart aches over the house paint?
*We have to choose joy.
One of my sweet sons asked me the other week why our friends all have nicer houses than we do. Oh, a moment of pang in my heart. But, I used this as an opportunity to talk to him about joy.
Yes, all of our friends have nicer houses than we do. It’s just the truth, and it was an honest question. I explained to my son that no matter our situation in life we must choose joy.
No one can choose joy for us.
*We need to give ourselves grace.
As I mentioned, we moved into this house with three children, and I was working 40 hours a week. I’ve since had three more babies. Yes, I could be Mrs. D-I-Y and install shelving and remodel bathrooms in my spare time, but honestly, I haven’t had it in me.
And that’s okay.
My final lesson in contentment goes back to my personal power verse:
Exodus 14:14, “The Lord shall fight for you, and you shall hold your peace and remain at rest.”
The Lord has fed me this verse in heaping portions over these last ten years. I’ve clung to it in pain and despair. I would write it on my hand when I had to leave my babies to work night-shifts. I’ve chewed these words, and I think the Lord has caught me spitting them back up a time or two, so He serves me another helping.
The Lord shall fight for me.
*The Lord shall fight for you.
Your situation may be far more profound than living in an almost century-old house that is falling apart. You may have a husband who works a lot of hours and is hardly home (been there), or a child who is causing heartache, or an unfair situation in which there just seems to be no justice.
I encourage you to look for your contentment in the Lord. Stand fast and know that He is faithful. He is the deliverer and the judge. He knows you, He cares, and He can use it all for His glory.
And though He even cares about my desire for new paint, He’s more interested in strengthening my heart.
I originally wrote this article for The Better Mom in 2013.
Thank you so much for this. Recently our family of 6 needed to move in with my MIL. It was a hard choice however she needed the help, and had the space for us. It has been very stressful for my DH and I. She and I have not really had a good relationship in the last five years. But God, I know this will work out for our family’s good. Your post is an inspiration and reminder of my journey and purpose here.
Thank you! Some days of surrender to trusting His plans and timing are easier than others. Thank you for this Bible verse. I’m writing it on my hand today because I need to fight for me. I’m the woman who doesn’t see her husband often and needs to find contentment in the Truth that God is enough for me, that He will stand in to strengthen me for that challenging child and comfort me in my neck pain. Thank you!
I’m literally sitting at my 3rd shift nursing job reading this right now. Thanks so much.
GOD MAKES ALL THINGS GOOD
Thank you for this post??
thank you for sharing your heart like this! This totally touched my life today where we are right now. I shared this on my blog for the women in my circle to read. I will be speaking at a church in two weeks… And this is exactly what I needed to hear and my own life and I can share with these women as well. Thank you for your ministry on YouTube, and Facebook. You might consider it a job with what you do on both of these… But it definitely is a ministry because you were touching hearts. From one homeschool mom to another and from one blogger to another.
Hey there, Lynn! I’m so glad you found this post encouraging. I DO consider everything I do a ministry to women. I just don’t call it that, but yes – it’s all a ministry. Thank you for the encouragement. xoxo
Wow, I read this with tears flowing! You are doing the work of the Lord in your writing. Its as if these words were sent straight from Gods mouth. It’s a beautiful article and I’m thankful I found it and that you wrote it. I remember the first night I had to leave my 6-week old baby all night while I worked night shift also as a nurse. I had a really hard time functioning, putting one foot in front of the other that night. I cried at intervals. In reading this it is comforting to know that God had things under his control and I didn’t even know it back then. This verse to me says, Gods got this! No matter what comes our way, God has it all under control and all we need to do is trust him. Thank you so much for sharing this.